Stalzy's Reuben + National Sandwich Day = Math. No, Food.

Hey, have you guys every heard of sandwiches? If you answer "no," I'll know you never bothered to read my epic and magnificent blog from last year, compiling all the sandwiches I'd eaten over a couple of years. And if that's the case, I think I owe you a Purple Nurple. Or a Nipple Cripple - I hear that's what they call them in Ireland. Well, an important holiday is upon us - National Sandwich Day is tomorrow! I hope you all celebrate by eating a sandwich at each meal. Come on, it's not hard. Put in some effort - this is the most major holiday we even HAVE.

Here in Madison, a city I visit quite often due to its proximity to my hometown of Sandwich, IL, as well as it's numerous and delicious food choices, a new deli has arrived in town. Stalzy's Deli on the east side of town has inhabited the building formerly housing Africana and about a zillion other businesses I can't remember. Research to find out what businesses? Um...no thanks. That requires work, see? And it's National Sandwich Day tomorrow, and I don't have time for this! Back to Stalzy's: awesome. Since I've only ever eaten one item from there, the reuben, I can't really call this a restaurant review. Instead, I'll call this what it is: sexy pictures of food and vague descriptions, interspersed with my personal and somewhat unprofessional opinion. YOU'RE WELCOME.

Here is the sandwich. The bread is toasted perfectly and leaves a bit of grease on your hands. You might want to forgo the small, thin napkins they give you and just lay down a towel on your lap. Tiny and numerous napkins will only detract from the sandwich eating.


The best part of this reuben is the balance of ingredients. If you've met me, you know I get a little funny about certain meats sometimes. Like, if there's ever a funny bite, I'll need to pull out all of the meat and just eat the cheese and sauce on bread. Not the case here at Stalzy's, my friends. The meat is tender and flavorful, and perfectly...um...cooked? Brined? What even is this meat? Whatevs, it's really incredible.


There is plenty of sauerkraut, but not too much cheese and dressing. Now, this was a big surprise to me, but I found these amounts to be just right. Usually, alls I want it extra cheese and extra sauce, but not in this case. The smaller amount of sauce doesn't make the bread soggy. The cheese doesn't overwhelm the meat or sauerkraut. The sandwich isn't giant, but it is so very filling. See, food can be like a complicated math equation. Which means math is cool. Get it?


This meal was impeccably completed by the addition of potato salad, a pickle, and a Dr. Brown's cream soda. Yes, impeccably. Because I chose them, duh. But really, it's because of Stalzy's. I know, I sound like such an ass-kisser in this, but I guess you now know the true way to my heart: an amazing reuben. And Stalzy's made it, so...suck it, everybody else.
Happy National Sandwich Day! Go visit Stalzy's tomorrow, or your favorite local deli or sandwich shop. Remember: a sandwich for 3-4 meals a day is not just a possibility, it is a dream come true! It's also an order, directly from me. Do it.